Church.

I really love church.

I always have.  When I was younger, like eight or nine, I like many of the day, brought up in the Left Behind fervor, would often think of where I wanted to be when the rapture happened.  I didn't pick home, though the blue house I grew up in will always be special, I didn't choose my grandparents house where I spent countless Sunday afternoons.  I picked the front row of Friendship Baptist Church. I wanted to see the green carpet, look at the big pulpit and I wanted my dad to be playing piano.

That sounds a little crazy to me now, but I think it really reveals what I have known all my life, but am only beginning to know now - I really love church.  When I have to rehearse my call, or give a intro to my life story (with seminary and camp this happens more often than you would think) I say we weren't at church every time the doors were open, we were ones who were opening the doors.  I grew up literally with the church as a second home.

One of the fondest memories of have of growing up in church is of a Sunday night tradition.  After the pastor was done preaching we would all join hands around the sanctuary and sing;

"I'm so glad I'm a part of the family of God,
I've been washed in the fountain, cleansed by his blood.
Joint heirs with Jesus as we travel this sod.
For we're part of the family,
The family of God."

Those are holy words to me now.  The sense of community I felt growing up in a rural Arkansas church is a sense of community I long for others to feel.  I want four year old little boys to get to ride to Pizza Hut after church with their second parents every Sunday night.  I want them to remember staying with close friends from church when their mom has had a baby or had surgery.  I want them to see church as a sense of family.

In college I felt that too.  It wasn't uncommon the last two years of my undergraduate career to walk in the Anderson house after church and sit for a couple of hours and do homework.  I felt welcome.  That's church.

Church is messy too, though isn't it?  It has been messy from the very beginning.  Acts shows us that.  In Acts 6 the deacon ministry is established when no one is there to care for the widows.  Before that in chapter 5 Ananias and Sapphira are put to death.  Church is messy.

While I have never seen husband and wife carried out on stretchers from business meetings I have seen my share of messy-ness in churches.  I have seen heated business meetings.  I have seen nasty chain letters.  I have sat under theological, ethical, moral and social squabbles.  Church is messy.  And why is that?  Because church is full of humans.

Church is going to continue to be messy.  History says it will. Great Reformations, Schisms and other things. Labels like evangelical and conservative and liberal and fundamentalist all are going to be placed on name tags and given out.  It is going to happen.  What do we do with it? What do we do with a church full of all this human-ness?

But that is what Jesus created his church to be - human. But holy.  How are we holy, because 1 Corinthians 12 tells us we are the Body of Christ.  We are to be him to the world.  That has sooo many implications I am just now beginning to understand.  We are to be Christ to the world. We are his body.  We, together, the church.

When we take communion we are symbolically taking the body and blood of Christ.  We are to remember what he did, and thus in doing so remember what we are to do in response.  We do this as a Church.  One body. One spirit. One faith. One baptism.

Friends, Paul warned the Corinthians we do not preach Apollos or Cephas or James or Paul.  We preach Jesus Christ and him crucified.  We are the image of Christ, through his church.  We are the Body of Christ.

Similarly we don't preach Piper, or Chandler or Beth or Louie.  We don't preach Barbara or Fred or Scot or Stanley or whoever. We preach Christ and we him crucified.

Growing up those call and response sections in the Baptist Hymnal were often ignored.  In seminary I've learned to appreciate various types of liturgies.  I love when we read scripture the reader always concludes with, "this is the word of the Lord."  And as a community, as a church we respond, "Thanks be to God."  What a great picture that is. One voice.

Dear Pope Francis,

Dear Pope Francis,

I am a fan.

Everything I read about you screams...I follow Jesus.  You are literally the most powerful man in Christendom, in fact you are the most powerful man in the religious community period.  Well, I mean there is Jesus and those millions of people who follow Mohammed, but hey let's face it, they look to you too.

You care about poor people.  You care about living in luxury.  You are living with the other people who work in the Vatican, not the papal palace.  You are living out what your church, The Catholic Church has demonstrated so well through the years, to take care of people.  You tweet.  And in those tweets you ask us to pray for you.  Pray for you?  You and the people of your faith believe that you act "in persona Christi," in the person of Christ for your people.  If you wanted to (which it has been done like twice) you could speak from the Bishop's chair and your words would be infallible. Yet, you are asking us to pray for you.  That is powerful humility, my friend. Get it, Pope Francis.

Your very Baptist friend,
Will

Protestant friends,

Support his man.  Pray for him.  Rather you like it or not he represents you to the world. They see him as the face and voice of Christianity, you don't have to like it, but it is reality.

I saw so many things making fun of him during conclave.  Making fun of what they do.  Stop it. It was all in good fun, but seriously this man could usher in a huge change in the way Christianity is viewed around the world. Please lets join hands and share the gospel instead of dividing further.

Go, be Christ's people. His little c, catholic church. We are all in this together, and not just high school musical style for real.

Again,
Will

Blessed are the Peace Makers

I was reading my Bible last week and had a particularly heavy heart.  Recently I have been asking God what he wants me to do in this thing we call life.  I mean,  I certainly have my passions.  I love kids, I love camp, I love helping those in need but the more and more I learn and grow I have a desire to know what that looks like.  It was almost like a brick hit me in the face when the word "peace" was whispered and I could almost hear it. I immediately jumped to Matthew 5 in my Bible and read, "Blessed are the peace makers, for they shall be called the sons of God."

What does that mean?  Well, for me it means a lot of things.  I am a Southern Baptist born and raised and I go to CBF seminary.  I attend a CBF church.  I spend my summers working for the second largest Christian publishing company in the world, a SBC affiliate.  I really do love both sides.  I do. I think they are both full of men and women that love and seek after the Lord, but I don't think both sides see the other that way.  I tend to see what they have in common - a magnificent passion for Jesus Christ and his gospel and not how they choose to describe the inspiration of Scripture.  Because I see that they both love Jesus.

Today, my facebook wall was filled with red equal signs as people's profile pictures.  I read and then hid hundreds (or it seemed like) statuses on the Supreme Courts pending decision on same sex marriage. I heard a lot of things.  "Heavy hearts." "Intolerance." "Bigots."  And it made me sick.  Both of them.  I found a lack of grace among both parties.  Let me say a few things.  First, friends, lets have an opinion.  By all means, let it happen.  But, let us be graceful in that opinion.  Friends that support homosexual marriage, have grace for your friends who don't.  They aren't (or shouldn't be) attacking you personally, they are just trying to live out their beliefs.  Friends, who do not support it, have grace! Your friends from the other side are warring inside themselves and hurting to try and figure out what God wants of them, shouldn't we all do that?

You see, us Protestants are fixed in on justification by faith alone, no works.  But, we fall into the trap so many times, forget St. Paul and Mr. Luther and add things as prerequisites to salvation.  You have to believe homosexuality is wrong to be a Christian.  You have to believe the Bible is inherrant to love Jesus. We had so much to the Gospel.  Some of you are reading this and saying, but the repentance is a prerequisite of salvation, Will. You have to repent to follow Christ.  I agree, mostly. I like it better if we say, if we follow Christ, we will repent.  Romans 10:9 tells us, "if we confess with our mouth that Jesus  is Lord and believe in our hearts that God raised him from the dead we will be saved." I think if we believe that we will repent.

And the truth will win.  What are you so afraid of?  Why are you so scared of people believing something different than you?  All you need to do is search so hard after truth.  You have to run toward it. Dig it out, eat it up.  Dwell in it.  And the truth will prevail.  If you are afraid of different beliefs then you might not be so grounded in the truth to begin with.

I would also like to briefly say that a popular phrase I have heard today is "you can't legislate morality." Well, you can.  We have. Should we, that can be a different story all together.  I don't think we can force someone who does not follow Christ to live a lifestyle that we live only because we do.  That being said, be careful.  Just be careful.

Did you notice I got all the way through this post and didn't state my opinion?  I didn't say what word I use to talk about inspiration of Scripture and I didn't say where I stand on marriage equality.  I will tell you, and chances are if you know me you know what I believe.  But, I do want to love and to make peace.  Because I think with all our arguing we are hurting the Gospel.  And that breaks my heart.  My heart is heavy because when people see our arguments and rants at each other they are not seeing Jesus, they are seeing the Evil One.  That is completely contrary to the Gospel.  It is damaging. It shatters it and tears it apart one thread at a time and I cannot see it anymore. We have to make peace.

We have to get over ourselves.  We have to realize there are people all over the world that are dying of starvation and we are arguing over who we can have sex with. We have to realize Jesus is a big, big God and he needs his whole, universal, catholic church to spread the Word. Make peace tonight, friends. Love like Jesus did. Speak truth, yes. But have grace, duh.  Go be the sons (and daughters) of God.  Go make peace.

Remember.

I remember talking with one of my friends way back over Christmas break about my life in Waco.  We were talking about the church I attend and various things that I like about it.  One thing I said was I really enjoy that we do communion on a regular basis.  It doesn't happen once a quarter or twice a year, but about once a month.  I love it, I told him.  Then he said something really profound that got me thinking....he said I understand communion and why we do it, but it has never really been a super spiritual experience for me.

Fast forward to several weeks ago taking communion at church. As the words were read and the bread broken, I asked myself am I getting anything out of this?  Is this benefiting me?  Is it edifying me?  Then, as I prayed I took a step back and realized...it isn't about me it is about remembering Jesus. Remember.

How often do we repeat similar mistakes and failures in our lives?  How often do we neglect the things we have been taught and learned from God?  The children of Israel did it.  When they finally crossed into the Promised Land they set up a stone, an altar to remember.  God told them to tell their children so that he could be remembered.  They didn't remember. Instead they sacrificed them to idols.

Isn't that what God sent Jesus to do? To remember?  Yes, I think it is.  We have the Holy Spirit inside of us and he helps me to remember.  When I get so bogged down and tempted by this world I need to reflect and remember.  Remember smiling faces looking at me from the steps at First Baptist Church.  I need to remember little boys crying after they have accepted Jesus as their savior.  I remember community and friendship God has used in my life.  I remember where I have come from and where I think God is going to lead me in the future.

But, how do we make that a consistent part of our lives?  Several things - first, walk with the Lord.  Jesus said you would know his children by the fruits they bear.  If we are truly seeking after God we are going to bear fruit.  It is going to happen.  Consistency is the name of the game.  I know no one is perfect, but it has to be an everyday thing. Prayer, scripture and reflection need to happen daily.

Lastly, I'd say we need community. We need people that remind us. That are honest with us. That call us back to those times God wants us to remember.

Jesus said it, "As often as you eat this bread and drink this cup, this do in remembrance of me."

A Legacy

Have you ever heard of Jerol Swaim?  Probably not unless you are a student of Williams Baptist College or know one.  To us WBCers the man is a living legend.  He recently retired as the President of Williams after serving at the school for 48 years. 48.  What made Dr. Swaim a good president?  He knew his students.  He could tell me that the college must be stooping to a new low because I'd been picked to be an RA, he could pull up behind me at a gas station in town and demand I pay for his gas, he sent hand written Christmas cards to every student every year and he sent text messages telling you how good you did in the recent theatre production.  I learned at CentriKid that "ministry happens in the context of relationships."  I don't know if Jerol Swaim ever heard that, but he lived it.  He ministered to hundreds of college students for nearly 50 years, his entire professional career spent at a small Baptist college in a corn field.  He left a legacy.

I thought about this subject again over Christmas break.  My Papa passed away after being very sick for a very long time.  As I prepared words to say at the funeral I realized how much of an example my Papa set with his actions.  He was a hard worker, he loved fiercely, he was slow to anger and he raised his children to love God and their neighbor.  Those are the words I said in a nutshell through tears on the day we laid him to rest.  The sad part is those words were criticized.  By a pastor that said we did not present the gospel at that funeral.  If telling about the life of my Papa and the legacy he left isn't the gospel I don't know what is.  Every time I preach a sermon it was because he lived the gospel.  Every time Meggin teaches a class full of students its because he lived the gospel.  Every time Racheal takes care of a patient, its because he lived the gospel.  Folks, if you leave a legacy you are preaching the gospel.

How?  Well, I'm 22 years old.  I don't know how to "leave a legacy."  But I do know it can't be just to leave one.  In other words the best left legacies were left by people that weren't full of themselves and they were certainly humble (see yesterday's post).  Friends, leaving a legacy isn't about becoming famous.  It is about the gospel.  It is about relationships and ministry.  A lot of people don't know who Jerol B. Swaim is or John Bane.  But I do.  And that has impacted the kingdom.

I really thought of all of this again this week when I got an email from my church back in Walnut Ridge.  Miss Jackie Burton, church member and long time servant of students at Williams Baptist College had passed away.  Miss Jackie was a warrior of the faith. She served as BSU director and in several other capacities at Williams for 30 plus years. Each time some BCM director or state convention  worker came to chapel to speak they hugged Miss Jackie.  She was a pioneer in collegiate ministry in the state of Arkansas.  She was a college BSU director when women were barely allowed to go to seminary.  I did not get to know Miss Jackie as well as I would have wanted to.  She retired for good from Williams (now working in the cafeteria scanning id cards) my freshman year.  I do know Miss Jackie left a legacy though.  I think of so many WBC alums that have touched my life that were first touched by Miss Jackie.  I wonder if Miss Jackie wouldn't have been obedient to God's call, would there have been a Josh Goza in my life?  A Josh McCarty?  Or Michala Gallup?  Or even a Sam Rogers?  Maybe not.  Because Miss Jackie, she left a legacy.  For the gospel. Not for herself.

Go and do likewise.

Humility and Hypocrisy

You know when you read FaceBook posts or tweets and you see ridiculous grammar errors?  You think to yourself can this person spell?  Is this person even literate?  They should be banned from using social media ever again?  I understand, so that's just me. Well, I digress.  The truth is not really, you see I was presented with this gem the other day from my friend Hannah.  She likes to keep me on my toes, its like her favorite pass time.  I understand why she is pretty good at it:

Really?  Aloud?  Come on, now!

You see sometimes the things that annoy me the most are the things I do so often.  It is like the old adage from I don't know...Jesus, that says take the plank out of your eye before judging your friend (or FaceBook friend, though I'm not sure the two are synonymous always). You see, I have a real problem with the word humility.  I didn't think I did.  You see, I am not the type of person that thinks highly of myself.  Really, I'm not.  I don't like the way I look.  I have ears the size of Dumbo's, I weigh like 10,000 more pounds than I did in high school.  I am not good a techy stuff, I am not athletic, I don't like to run, I'm not in a relationship (which negates marriage as well)....the list could go on.  This summer God tried to teach me two lessons (well more than that but we will focus on two of them here).  First, he taught me as Ellie would say, "Will, you're good at stuff."  There are things I am good at, maybe not the proverbial small town Arkansas kind of things but I am good at stuff.  I am good with kids, I can write, I can generally preach decently, I love camp, I am organized...those are things God made me good at to use for his glory.  But here comes the second lesson God taught me..."Will, be humble."

There were a couple of times when he screamed it in my face. The first I can think of is when I got some type of stomach bug traveling from our first location to the second. I was driving a Ryder and we were in the middle of nowhere Arkansas and had been traveling for about 20 minutes when it hit me.  I needed to go to the bathroom stat.  Not a good thing to do when you are 20 minutes into a 14 plus hour road trip.  That wasn't the last time we had to stop.  The rest of the afternoon I slept and woke up and then we had to stop.  God said, "Hey Will, I'm in charge...you aren't."

You would think that would teach me the lesson.  It didn't so much.  You see, I realized for most of my life I had replaced my insecurities with arrogance.  I had overcompensated, putting on a front that I had everything together.  Why?  I don't really know why.

I read this verse recently and it is kicking my rear end (Jesus + Jen Hatmaker = Convicted Will):

"Yet they seek me daily and delight to know my ways, as if they were a nation that did righteousness and did not forsake the judgement of their God."  Isaiah 58:2

Y'all I have been Israel.  So much of last semester I spent time, "seeking God daily."  I was seeking God to better myself. To become a better person, a better pastor, a better Assistant Director at camp this summer. I was seeking God to improve me.  It kind of has a Joel Osteen ring to it now that I write it down (Lord forgive).  But y'all that isn't the goal.  Sure, we want to become more like Jesus, thus a better person in the end but that isn't the goal.  Self improvement is not at the core of the gospel.  The gospel isn't about us.  Its about Jesus.  It is about denying us.  Denying myself.  Like Kyle Idleman puts it in Not A Fan, the gospel is about death.  Jesus bids us to come and die.  It isn't a gospel of self improvement. And when that is what it becomes we are hypocrites.

A hypocrite's fast is useless.
A hypocrite's sacrifice is detestable to the Lord.
A hypocrite's offering is not fragrant.

It is to those people (many of us and certainly me) that God says:

"Behold in the day of the fast you seek your own pleasure and oppress all your workers." Isaiah 58:3b

.....and

"Fasting like yours this day will not make your voice heard on high."   Isaiah 58:4b

I'm a hypocrite.  Isaiah 58 is just as telling today as when the Israelites first heard it.  Repentance is needed.  You see, a lack of humility almost certainly leads to hypocrisy.  Which often if not always leads to idolatry.  Putting ourselves, status, friends, family or whatever else before God.

Will, be humble.  Don't be a hypocrite.

Chacos in December

In Texas, you can wear your Chacos in December.  It is perfectly acceptable, mostly because it is hot.  You see what I did there?  Instead of complaining that it is December and it isn't cold, thus it doesn't feel like Christmas I found the positive. This time.

I don't usually do that, honestly.  I have been finding things lately that I absolutely abhor about my station in life.  I am never going to graduate from grad school, I miss my friends, I want to fast forward in life to the amazing summer I know I'm going to have.  In the midst of it all I am not grateful, not at all.  I recently read Ann Voskamp's One Thousand Gifts everyone go read it, now.  It is different.  She writes in a way that I haven't seen before, but it is beautiful and honest and revolutionary.  In the midst of reading Ann's book, I am amazed at how ungrateful I truly am.

I was on top of a ladder the other night at work, sifting through lay-a-ways trying to find the illusive bag I needed, sweat dripping from my forehead and then my scanner died.  On top of a ladder.  Didn't know where else to look for this order...anger abounded.  It is amazing how amidst the anger and especially in a time when you haven't really been listening to God all that well, he shows up.  He said, Will you have a job.  You see months earlier I complained to him every day because I didn't.  Now I do.  Though it may not be a hug career aspiration, I like the people I work with.  People may get angry over stupid things, but I get to (or should) show them Jesus.

So, here's to being grateful.  Ann says that thankfulness proceeds the miracle, that gratitude is a prerequisite for faith.  I haven't had a lot of either of those things lately.  I have just been running on fumes, not taking time to let God show up and help me out. My friend helped remind me of that yesterday, read that here. I haven't been grateful and faith has been missing out because of it.  Without faith, there is certainly a lack of obedience.  Which is required to walk with God.

This place in my life is not fun.  It may get there.  But, it also isn't horrible. I'm not suffering.  God is providing.  He will see me through and if something else is supposed to happen, he'll show me that too.  Just gotta be thankful and walk with him.  Every day.  Obey, that's it.

I should go study for finals and be productive.

But first...

I'm going to go put my Chacos on and get some lunch.